Okay, so I know that I shouldn’t even be asking that question. I know that millions of wives, girlfriends, hell, even side chicks are waiting for Valentines Day with high hopes of receiving gifts, sweet gestures and showers of love. Others have all the answers and go for a simple explanation of why they don’t believe in Valentines Day (which usually leaves a very disappointed partner); Their answer is that you should show someone your love every day and not just on Valentines Day. There are even people that are searching urgently and desperately right now to find someone to spend the day with, just so they don’t have to spend it alone. Whatever your feeling toward Valentines day may be, it clearly is an event for lots of people in this life. My question though, is whether, after 3 children, is it still an event in mine?
Now, reading that sentence, I know what you’re about to say. You’re about to jump up and down and inform me that just because we have children, it does not mean that romance should fly out the window. Okay, I totally agree, but my situation is a little different. I won’t even be seeing Avi for Valentines Day as he works far away and Valentines Day falls on a weekday. And although I will see him on Saturday, do you think anyone is going to remember that February 14th passed us by? With three kids to see to, by the time you run, shout and play referee, all thoughts of Valentines Day fly out of the window.
But maybe this is the problem with relationships today; we don’t take time out to just be together. This life is so busy, doing the things that we have to do that we don’t make the time for each other. Relationships, like every other fragile thing, need to be handled with care and in this day and age of busy schedules, multiple kids and no me time, we forget that relationships are so fragile. We take for granted what we have is strong, but how would it continue to be strong if we don’t look after it?
Don’t get me wrong here, I’m NOT trying to convince you to celebrate Valentines Day or to even get your partner a gift. I am however, trying to remind you that we do need to spend time with each other so that we don’t lose each other on the way. Even though I now have three children, my husband has made a point of listening to the things that I want as well. I’m not talking about materialistic things, I’m talking about things that matter to my soul. If you read my post partum update, you would know that I was feeling really down. I spoke to Avi and to be honest, even though we had the busiest weekend, he still made it special and worthwhile. I think thats whats important; Taking care of each others soul.
I know that you can show someone that you love them daily by doing the little things, like making their coffee exactly the way they want it or by making sure that lunch is tied, with a sweet note attached but it doesn’t hurt to pull out all the stops now and again. I mean, its great if you are the type of person that does small things everyday that show the other person that you love them but sometimes, you need to ACTIVELY put in an effort. Sometimes you need to go that extra mile and say to the person that you love them and then take their breath away with something you created. It doesn’t have to be something you spent loads of money on, it can be something that you spent some time on.
So if you don’t believe in Valentines Day, thats cool with me but make sure you take a couple random days this year to shower your partner with love and strengthen the bond between you both. I now have three kids and even though, sadly (hah, yes, I am one of those girls that do like to celebrate Valentines Day 😂😂) , Valentines Day may not be a thing anymore for us, you can bet your life I am committed 100% to making my relationship work and last as long as I can.
Are you celebrating Valentines Day? If you are, what are you up to? And if you aren’t, what are your plans?
Simone Gobin is a 24 year old, it graduate, wife to Avi and mother to Yash & Ralee Gobin. She spends her days being a mother and a wife. She has decided to start a blog as a creative outlet as well as connect with other parents. Her belief is that there is a lot to learn from other parents out there and she welcomes all advice possible.