#WisdomWednesday – Decoding Women

You know men always complain about having to ‘decode’ women and I don’t understand why. I mean we are simple human beings at core level. We just want comfort, appreciation, love and care. We do a lot daily, for each and every member of the household. Globally, the term ‘Super Mom’ is known and understood. Many people feel that it is EXPECTED of a female to do so many things. Another well known saying is of course, that woman are great multitaskers. I’m not sure if that is a proven fact but to be honest, it’s more of a stereotype than anything else.

But anyway instead of moving into a great rant and ramble about the stereotypes for women, I thought that I would rather share some insight (that’s probably already been shared somewhere else on the great big world wide web) on women.

Not all women are the same. Come on, this is self explanatory. If you think all women are the same, then you clearly have not met many women at all! Also, if you look at us with that outlook, then why do you complain if we do the same?

We like to talk ..to YOU. Yeah, all that rambling that you hear from us is actually needed. Yeah, we have girlfriends to talk to, but it’s not the same as sharing our feelings with the one that is closest to us. We obviously don’t expect you to sit down with a tub of icecream and have a good cry with us, but just paying attention and being interested in what we say, means a whole lot! It’s a great bonus to hear you reference to a previous conversation that we had, because it means that you were ACTUALLY listening and not feigning interest.

Put your phone away. Nothing sucks to us more than you chatting away happily when we’re trying to have a conversation with you. It just looks to us like you’re more interested and happy talking to someone else instead of us.

Be honest, but gentle. Be honest with us, we may get upset but honestly, we appreciate it. However, if you want to be honest, be gentle too. A few bad words can do a lot of damage to a person’s heart, so put yourself in our shoes and think about whether you would like it if we told you something harshly.

We need love, hugs, kisses & cuddles. Yeah, we sound like babies right? Well we might not ACTUALLY be babies, but we also need some sweetness in our lives. Love us when it’s hard to, hug us when words fail you, kiss us just because you can and cuddle us to seal the deal.

We complain but we love you and so we do it. Have you not ever complained in your life about something you don’t mind doing yet no one appreciates? We complain, oh yes we do. Mostly because if you see your to-do list compared to ours, yours is basically empty! So yes we complain about picking your socks up and off the floor but we do it with no ill intention and we do it because we love you.

We have bad days & sick days. Contrary to popular belief, us women, are NOT Superwomen and we have bad days and sick days. We don’t get to take a sick day as a mum nor do we get a day off for another bad day. When you are sick, we tend to you. Please, will you do the same for us?

Be understanding. Jumping to conclusions never worked out for anyone. Don’t do it. WAIT for us to finish what we are trying to say and then ASK us to explain. Asking won’t kill you.

Pay Attention. No, really. Pay real attention. It really matters. Women hate to ask directly for things. We would rather HINT to you that we want something & pray that you actually got the hint. Nothing sucks more than hinting at one thing and receiving another (well, sometimes, nothing at all!). SO pay more attention to what we say because all the answers are there, you’re just NOT listening hard enough.

Keep your promises. This one is an EXTREMELY important one. The more you break the promises that you make, the less we actually have faith in you. No faith = No trust. Do I have to break it down anymore or did you get the hint????

Don’t do morally incorrect things. Another EXTREMELY important one. Don’t cheat or do any other equally morally compromising thing. Once trust is broken, it will never be the same. EVER.

I may not be able to jot down EVERY SINGLE thing but these are a few of the important things that a lot of woman need. Without the above many women tend to feel lonely, alone and unappreciated. Once that happens, the fights tend to start and then they just get bigger and bigger until finally one day, none of you can take it anymore. Relationships are hard work, but they are totally worth it! Just always try to understand what the other person is saying and where they are coming from. Be considerate and kind…and, love always!

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Simone Gobin is a 24 year old, it graduate, wife to Avi and mother to Yash & Ralee Gobin. She spends her days being a mother and a wife. She has decided to start a blog as a creative outlet as well as connect with other parents. Her belief is that there is a lot to learn from other parents out there and she welcomes all advice possible.

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